i just woke up from my nap and was kinda shocked to see how late it already is. i slept at 3.50PM, i think. well, i planned to wake up at 4.30PM. but now, it's 5.15PM.

anyways, i think this is going to be some long post because i have quite a lot to update on, don't i? let's start!

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FRIDAY
yes, this is the unfateful day where a bunch of girls were herded off to acs(i) against our wills to attend a Passion Talk.

if anything, the reception was worse than the talk itself. and you know how boring these kind of talks can get, right? except that this talk was maybe marginally interesting-- about Leadership and all. i guess something got into that dense brain of mine as i doodled away on the Post-it, which was a souvenir of the talk. i was still traumatised by the very LOWWWWWWW voices of the very-much-forgotten male human beings.

and then, they announced for Tea. which i think they shouldn't have, because 1) i didn't know there was going to be tea, and so, immediately perked up and 2) when you perk up, you use up energy. thus, you feel hungry. and what do you do when you feel hungry? YOU WANT TO EAT.

so i was there, rotting away for the last few minutes because this SUDDEN HUNGER befell over me. i was practically like a bird waiting for its chance to just fly out of that lecture hall.

but then, we had to take a group picture first and all of a sudden, i remember how much i used to DETEST taking pictures. somehow or another, i've lost all enthusiasm in cam-whoring. maybe it just isn't the same without 2g. but i'm not going to digress. i'm going on.

after that picture-taking, i hurried sarah, nicole and eunice so they'd move slightly faster. alas! when we reached the reception area, imagine the light on my face when i saw FOOD.

i couldn't eat immediately and was itching to. we stood around for reasons i don't know about and finally, the wonderful mr yeo came over and bestowed words of wisdom upon us: "why are you girls still not eating? go and eat la! free food leh!"

yesyes. how precious and true those words are. maybe nicole and sarah was waiting for mr yeo's cue or something, but we finally started the queue for Food.

finally, we can pile currypuffs and siewmais and some crossiant-thing-filled-with-chocolate on our tiny environmentally unfriendly styrofoam plates. of course, audrey can't let her hunger overcome so much so she looks like some greedy freak, right? so, one of each then. three miserable foodstuff lying on the plate and she goes in search of a FORK.

please, by this time, i think my stomach was rebelling against me and i felt extremely cross. where can the forks be placed?! i don't think i showed my grumpiness for audrey's ALWAYS composed. always. so, she looked around with those sharp eyes of hers and it fell on TWO forks, on the hands of this idiotic guy.

why 'idiotic'? i don't even know him.

but i overheard him! he was laughing away about how he has two extra forks and his Singaporean kiasu-ness.

like, wth?! other people can't even find the forks and here you have TWO EXTRA ONES?

he suddenly stops laughing when he turns his head back and sees this two murderous eyes on him. GEP students will always be GEP students. he offers his two extra forks to me immediately. smart move, if i could say so myself. i take it, thank him sweetly and turn back triumphantly, offering the other fork to jingning.

finally, i can sink the much-looked-for-SMALL fork into those three miserable foodstuff and actually fill my stomach up.

i didn't even mind that they were COLD, okay, i didn't! but really, i honestly think that they could have gotten much better food. one of the speakers for the Passion Talk was the owner of Sakae Sushi! i thought that some marvelous sushi feast was awaiting us and practically drooled at the daydream of that.

i only liked the crossiant-tastealike and it wasn't even that satisfactory! i was very eager to go home to much greater foods.

and it's here, where i start telling about how i got a ride in mr yeo's car!

it's a light blue Honda Jazz. and it's a small car! i've considered getting a Honda Jazz after a get my driving license before. infact, i've considered getting a small car, in general. small and nice and cute. preferably pink, of course. but i've come to this decision that any unique colour is fine. (unique colour, as in rarely seen on roads. you know, like orange and green and yeah.) i might even oblige my sister and get a lovely turquoise colour if it's pretty and unique.

gah. look at me digress.

bttp. he was just giving me and jingning a lift to the Buona Vista MRT station, then he had to go off to fetch his K2 daughter. how cute!

if you think that concludes my friday, you're wrong! you WERE correct, but then i decided to make you wrong, so i'm adding on more stuff. i'm capable of crapping okay.

so i went home and to my delight, my mom's cooking soup noodles! much much much nicer than rubber-like siewmais! and while enjoying the slurpy noodles, i get to watch my kdrama. yayyay. this new kdrama's so funny and touching at the same time. it's really a mix of laughter and tears. except that i don't cry. i don't cry at home when i watch touching shows. i get the bump in my throat and tears are rising up, on the brink of spilling over and down my cheek. but then i try my hardest hardest to swallow it back. like i'm unfeeling and don't care whether the whoever just did a totally amazing and touching thing.

it's so uncomfortable, yes. but i'd rather go through with all the horrible swallowing tears thing then let my brother take one look at me and shout victoriously, "YOU'RE CRYING!" and proceeds to laugh at me, never letting me off thereafter. this is the reason why i never cease thinking about watching kdrama with jacq and emily. they know about how i sob loudly in movies and even if they DO laugh about me, it somehow isn't quite bad. anyway, we'd surely cry together. so there goes the teasing problem. as for the laughing part, no problem man. if you ever need anyone to laugh for you, find us. we'll reach your daily laughing quota for you, no probs.

you see! i've crapped so much, you would expect to read something more, won't you. but no! i'm ending right here. and going on to Sat&Sun.

SATURDAY AND SUNDAY
it should really be called the 'Shopping Days'. i've always thought that shopping could never never EVER be a chore. but then my mom makes me realise how wrong that statement is. really, she has this amazing ability to make EVERYTHING a chore. even shopping!

we went to OG, Isetan, Takashimaya, Heeren, Far East Plaza just to finish up our New Year Shopping. i'll bet we spent thousands over dollars for this whole shopping thing!

just ME alone, got:
- 2 new jeans
- 1 new white OP skirt
- 1 new white shorts
- 1 new dark turquoise heels
- 3 new tops
- 1 new white dress

times that whole list by about two and it's only ME AND MY SISTER'S NEW CLOTHES. imagine our MOTHER's. goodness gracious, she even spent $200 over bucks on a single Levi's jeans. not to mention how much she'd thrown away effortlessly to shoes. she's amazing, i tell you. even emily, THE Emily, would have to lose to her.

i'm not kidding.

maybe that's a good thing la, then i wouldn't have to buy so much for the rest of the year. all at one go. good but scary strategy.

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AHA. i surprised you with that abrupt ending again, right? hehheh. i'm getting very good at surprising you guys, aren't i? of course, with that skill comes annoyance at me.

but really, i can FEEL that i've written alot and how many people managed to read until this point of time AND is still alive? i see a great deal of perserverance and future in you. GO, YOU! it's a great feat, reading so much crap and STILL live to tell the tale. you can go apply for the Guiness World's Record if you have so much time. i won't be surprised if they reject you, however. the judges probably have lost casualties trying to mock at what a minor record that is. it's not, okay. oooh. maybe they can award ME too? for being the Mother of Crap. that doesn't sound very glam, but it's okay. i get contented easily.

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i think that's all i want to say for the past few days and maybe add on the fact that i still have a huge pile of homework that i've yet to complete. nevertheless, i feel that i should add on what i have to say, even though you probably won't understand. or rather, don't bother to understand. the following paragraph is just for me to vent my ...frustrations?

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being a Full Lit student has its pros and cons.

i like analysing minor details; details that usually people miss out. somehow, i find great satisfaction in that. it can be analysis of books, and it can also be the analysis of people. so far, i've been consciously analysing and annotating books, scouring every inch of those pages just to unravel what the author has to say, what he has carefully hidden for us to dig out. should i be an author, i think i would like myself to imagine a class of bright students trying to annotate my book. isn't it a great honour? that people actually spend time and effort to care about what you have to say. and not only about what you have to say about the story. it's also about why you say that about the story-- are you mocking society? or praising it?

then, i recently realise how i've been subconciously analyzing people. yes, don't be surprised. people CAN be analyzed. why do they say that? do they say one thing and mean another? and carefully, you can actually find out more about those people if you analyse them enough-- about what they say and do. maybe it's perverted in a sense, but then again, is it a crime that you're trying to understand the people around you?

mainly, i've been analyzing Miss June Tan. she's quite a fascinating person if you haven't come to terms with that fact. she has that x-factor of making lessons interesting; something not all teachers possess, sadly. don't you find her eccentric? the things she does are so different from what other teacher would do, especially the things she says. which teacher you know takes great joy in making their students become S-L-A-V-E-S? i actually think that there's quite a number of people who'd love being her slave, no doubt. being her slave makes you somehow closer to her, and some people like Miss Tan enough to want that.

people like me, for instance. i think i'm like this annoying student who loves sucking up to teachers. why? because it means that the teacher likes you and only you? that you feel more important than the rest? no. because teachers can also become friends of ours, but their age makes them different from normal friends. you want to know what they think of certain things. you want to talk to them more because they see things in a different viewpoint. and maybe you want to talk to them because it boosts your ego in the knowledge that you're having an actual conversation with someone older than you are.

but i've given up already. i'm not someone who is determined and really goes after what she wants. maybe i'll try. but if i try, and it doesn't work out, then i give up. it's sad, when i come to terms that i'm going to give up. but i'd rather give up now, rather than later, because i always think that the higher i go, the greater the fall. call me a coward for being afraid to fall, but that's just the way i am.

so yes, i've given up on trying to gain Miss Tan's favour. it's no use anyway. students who attract her attention are students who are interesting and different from the norm, students who can entertain her when she doesn't feel like entertaining anybody else. maybe when she reads my blog, she disagrees with me about how she is. but that's the light i see her in. i admit i'm sorry i'm not interesting enough or entertaining enough or fascinating enough. but what can i do about that? i'm already quite desperate in wanting her to like me. i won't overdo things. it ends when it ends. and i think that it has already long ended. that's quite sad, actually, don't you think?

haha. look at how much i've digressed. "being a Full Lit student has its pros and cons." what's that about man? probably just an excuse for me to admit that i've given up on gaining Miss Tan's favour.

it IS a burden, though, this subconscious analysis thing. because i don't only analyse others, i analyse myself too. sometimes i have this impression that others actually analyse me, and so, do things on purpose. that makes me think that i'm too fake. and recently, someone made me feel that i'm probably too fake in trying to suck up to Miss Tan.

Miss Tan's a wonderful teacher, and i doubt i'd stop liking her. but i shan't try so hard anymore. maybe marvel in her eccentricness from afar? haha, how emo that sounds. like i'm dying or something.

gaww. i've ranted on for so long, but boy, do i feel so much better already! thanks to the people who actually read this far, who actually bothered. don't feel bad that you needed to waste time. i need to too.